happy new year - 2011

PACE

"we women have a lot to learn about simplifying our lives. we have

to decide what is important and then move along at a pace that is

comfortable for us. we have to develop the maturity to stop trying

to prove something. we have to learn to be content with what we

are."

- marjorie pay hinckley

choosing 'pace' as my word for 2011 has been on my mind for a couple of months now, but when i read the above quote it was a done deal. it is dead on. it also didn't hurt that it contained two of the words that i have chosen as my 'word of the year' in the past. i was new to blogging and hadn't written about 'patience' in 2006, or 'simplify' in 2007, but in 2008 i wrote about my word 'gentle'. in 2009 i had chosen 'focus', and this past year my word has been 'contentment'. i've re-read these posts and had to laugh at how similar my feelings have been in choosing each of them. i guess i'm just finding different ways to learn the same lessons.

i wrote a bit in my 'gentle' post about how i tend to do everything at a hurried pace. i'm not sure why that is, but i'm starting to drive myself crazy. for instance a few months ago, when the weather was still really hot, i found myself in front of the fridge filling up water bottles to send with the kids to school. as i was forced to stand there waiting for the seeming trickle of water to fill up the contrastingly enormous bottles i was overcome with the feeling that i was not being efficient enough. i mean i was trapped holding this bottle under the dispenser and i couldn't even reach a washcloth to wipe the counter with my other hand while i waited. there wasn't anything on the stove for me to stir, and there was no way the child who needed her hair brushed was going to oblige. i'm embarrassed to say that it was torture. right when i thought i was going to go nuts with all my nervous energy, i realized i had a true problem. who in the world cannot stand still for 2 minutes without feeling lazy? me...that's who. i mean i was filling up the water bottles, but that was the only thing i was doing...and it wasn't enough. like i said...i have a problem. that is when i truly decided that i need to do something about it. i don't have to be doing 100 things at the same time to be effective. in fact, i'm pretty sure the opposite is true. i have failed to give my full attention to any one task or person for years. what a waste. i desire to live more fully in each moment and savor the everyday.

i recently came across another quote that really inspired me, and seems to relay a similar message. it is one from helen keller. it reads:

"i long to accomplish great and noble tasks, but my duty is to accomplish humble tasks as if they were noble and great." (and i would add at the end: ...because they are)

oh how i wish i could sear that into my soul. i have been enjoying my most favorite christmas present (because i didn't get what i really wanted which was kids who always spoke kindly, got along famously, and listened the first time...but where's the fun in that right?!) which is the complete set of little house on the prairie episodes. i loved that show with all my heart as a child, and probably even more so as an adult and mother. i have found myself longing to be just like ma ingalls. she embodies the above quote. yes yes i know it's a t.v. show and there isn't anyone quite that perfect, but i can strive to be like that no?! she is sweet, good, loving, selfless, and kind. i know if i can pace myself better then i can get that much closer to becoming like caroline ingalls.
so happy new year to all, and here's to slowing down our pace a little. take time to really see, hear, and enjoy all the things our beautiful lives have to offer. we are blessed, i am blessed, and i'm going to do my best to live like mother theresa said, 'do small things with great love'.